... in which I create some mayhem at the pub

Now, the younger members of my family like to enthuse about the various benefits of drinking liquid made from hops and grapes. I myself have never had a taste for such things (scratchy to eat, and squashy, respectively), but last Friday evening they decided, while the older generation were away in South Korea (a place not for my kind, apparently) to take me to ‘the pub’, a place about which they rave incessantly.

Good times

Naturally at the idea of any kind of outing, I became very excited, so much so that they exchanged concerned glances and utterances of ‘maybe this isn’t such a good idea’, as they watched me leap onto the sofa and chase my own tail in a never ending circle of joy, but as they had a friend with them, one with a very big truck and who is stronger than the pair of them put together, they figured ‘three against one shouldn’t be too bad’. So I hopped into the truck with usual aplomb and of course, secretly set about chewing his wires and large music-box.
We arrived at the place they reverently call ‘the pub’ on a delightful evening, weather wise, although I myself prefer when it’s raining as there are lots of raindrops to chase, and I jumped the not-to-be-scoffed-at-height from the truck immediately, and of course took off at a gallop towards some frightened looking Australians and their small children, who I suspected wanted to be my new best friends but had such assumptions quickly squashed.
This first hurdle over with, I was then quickly put on my lead and escorted not very gently into this pub, even though I was pulling and straining to get through the same door, which was a nice sort of place with lots of wooden floors to be scratched and chair legs to be chewed. There I saw another potential best friend, a small curly dog who greeted me with an equal amount of enthusiasm, knocking his red-faced owner’s glass onto the floor and many apologies followed – I should think so too, clumsy oaf.

My new favourite place

They find this amusing

It was then decided that we should sit outside, as I agreed, it was a very warm evening and we were surrounded by lots of nice fields for me to romp in. No such luck. While two of them took me outside, their friend ordered some drinks and soon they had tied my lead to a table and began to ignore me, if you can imagine, while they sipped this strange-coloured liquid and talked about matters which do not interest me such as newspaper hacking, someone’s wedding (imagine being tied down to just one for the rest of your life – if I hadn’t had my unfortunate trip to the vet, I would be chasing as much tail as I could get. But I mustn’t be bitter, I do have a lot of nice female friends now which was impossible before), and matters which interest me slightly, like football (many an hour I have spent in the past, deflating footballs). They dropped the odd biscuit on the floor for me, to keep me entertained, and of course this worked for about five seconds, as I wolfed them down and put my head, endearingly, on the table, with a clever look I have been perfecting, copied from starving Africans on charity adverts on the television.
 Eventually and to my great excitement, the food arrived – I tracked the waitress with my eyes, as she carried three large plates all the way from the kitchen, up the path, and – to my shock and disgust – placed them not on the floor in front of me, but on the table. My friends of course dug in with relish but I was aghast with indignation – they seemed to have completely forgotten I was there – all I had was a measly bowl of WATER which I soon upended to show my displeasure, and a couple of boring treats. Obviously I put my paws up onto the bench to remind them of my presence, and my head under their arms, but to no avail. Fortunately, I got my revenge for this lack of attention – when one of them had gone in to fetch some more drinks (walking in a very funny manner, I must add) I quickly got my nose into a nice bowl of macaroni cheese, which I have discovered I like very much. By the time she came back, she seemed resigned to the fact that I was there and I needed the rest of the macaroni cheese, my new favourite, and I was allowed to continue eating it, to much head shaking and ‘Oh, Ollie’ being said.

My nemesis

So I can only conclude that my visit to the pub was a great success.In other news, I have been visiting my BFFs Nelly and Tui, and I managed to follow their lead and jump into their swimming pool. We were having a great laugh until we were politely asked to get out.
I’ve been on a few walks, to a new wood that my family have found, which has a great load of cow pats in a field next to it – I will always treasure memories of rubbing my face in these and rolling around in them, and then being marched down to the river to ‘wash off’.
Oh, and I've been chasing the cat around a lot too. I'm sure she enjoys it as much as I do.